Thursday, June 24, 2010

Dear Summer Grace

It has been four days since we found out you werent coming home to us. Four very long, hard days. All your stuff was ready for you. I even had your hospital bag packed. I NEVER imagined it would be this hard.
Jake still doesn't know. We are waiting to make sure that this is really going to happen this way. We have many telling us they feel that your birth mom will change her mind again. We don't want to tell Jake you aren't coming and then you do get to come home. I hate to break his heart.
I don't know what to do with your things. Friends have said to wait. I just cant deal with packing them away right now. Your crib is still up and waiting. The bedding Callie made will be in later this week. Many things we have had monogrammed for you will also be coming in.
I know each day will get better. God is taking care of us and you right now. Just know baby girl, there are many people and churches praying for you no matter what happens. That gives me peace. You will always be prayed for no matter who your mother is.
Love always

6 comments:

Misty Lane Oster said...

"I know the plans I have for you", declares the Lord, "plan to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11
You can find rest in the loving arms of Jesus during this hard time in your life, He will bring peace to your heart.

Ms. G said...

I am praying for your heart and for God's wisdom to all involved.

Jaclyn said...

I'll be praying for you! I know it's hard to hear and kind of cliche to say, but God DOES have a plan.

aimingarrows said...

I've been following Kelly's blog for a long time and your link in the comments jumped out at me. I just wanted to tell you that you are not alone. We have two children through adoption but we also had a third. Losing him was terrible. But, I want you to know the future can look bright again. The cloud you are currently in will lift in time.

I will be praying for you tonight and in the days to come.

Heidi

Elisabeth said...

I can't even tell you how sorry I am. Two years ago my husband and I (we're also the Bennett's) were trying to adopt two girls and long story short it fell through.

Last year we were amazed that we were able to get pregnant with the help of metformin but our sweet boy went to heaven at 14 weeks.

I know God has amazing plans in store for us (both of us)

My heart breaks for you and your family is in my prayers

Aunt Theresa said...

You are in my prayers.
Last summer the same thing happened to us. We were suppose to get a little boy....and it fell through. It was heartbreaking.
Two months later a little girl was placed in our arms so you just hold onto all your stuff. Just let it sit. I'm sure God has wonderful plans for you! In the meantime it's okay to weep and cry. The loss is terrible and heartbreaking.